I just got off the phone with a telemarketer in record time. I used a new technique – it just occurred to me on the fly – and it not only gets them off really quickly (so to speak) but it also screws up their computer files.
My old technique was a bit more interpersonally brutal. As soon as I could tell it was a telemarketer, I’d simply shout “I’m bleeding!” and then hang up the phone. It guaranteed they would free up the line.
This new one, well, I don’t know why I did it, exactly. The guy called said he was from Verizon online, and congratulated me on the fact that my phone now qualified for broadband/DSL. So I told him I already have verizon dsl. He said, “really?” I said ‘yeah. For a year, now. Great stuff!” He got off right away, and – I assume – entered me in the computer (incorrectly) as someone who already has Verizon DSL.
This should work for everyone. Worst case, tell them that you just signed up for whatever it is ten minutes ago. Then they’ll mark you in the books as someone who already has whatever it is, and not call you again.
Of course the whole thing may backfire. I’ll keep you posted.
And I’ll post something of greater value to the world, here, later today or tomorrow.